"That's Entertainment!"

You know that song...right? Now imagine it playing in the background as you read this.

But first, a word from our sponsor...

You can put diamond studded hubcaps or gold pinstriping on a jalopy all day long but it won't prevent it from being a clunker and breaking down on the way to the store.

If the political situation in this country is so dysfunctional and we are doomed anyway, we might as well have some fun on the way down. No?

So I propose that we look at our current candidates in that light...as entertainment.

Christine O'Donnell. What a funny lady. Really...witches, masturbation (no laughing matter if you're single, mind you...), etc. She's so funny. She upstaged Bill Maher...not an easy thing to do as he is one of the funniest people in the business.

And, Holy Cow...Carl Paladino. He is central casting. Can't you just see him in an episode of the Honeymooners where Ralph schemes to take over City Hall by dressing like a politician and promising a meatloaf (presumably made by Alice) to every voter. Paladino is his rival who promises a baseball bat to the first hundred people who vote for him. In walks Norton who wants to be the Commissioner of DPW and we're off to the races...the fun would be too much to handle. Mayor Paladino...or Mayor Kramden. You choose!!

Sharron Angle! Too much to take...I can't catch my breath! Asians! Please...stop! You're killing me! Please...I can't take anymore. Sharron!! I'm not kidding. Lay off. Not me from my job...just with the highjinks. I'm on the floor!!

And Lady Sarah. You absolutely slay me. You are sooooooo pretty, much prettier than Ann Coulter, and would be fun to date, maybe, like W would have been fun to have a beer with. And I love your monologues. You make me laugh but you also make me think. You are sort of like Mort Sahl or George Carlin. Very funny but also very politically saavy. What you don't know ain't worth knowin' (emphasis on "ain't" and "knowin'" ...without the "g") I hope you run for President. That will be four years of nonstop, madcap, hysterics...or hysteria...an unbelieveable run...sort of like Seinfeld but without the Upper West Side Jewish slant. More of an Alaskan, "lost in the wilderness" kind of thing. And the clothes will be great...plaid shirts and hunting vests...but designed by Dior for the city girl...wonderful!

And let's not forget Mr. Iott of Ohio. He could reinvent Sgt. Schultz from Hogan's Heroes. He could wear his uniform when he is proposing legislation and we could all watch him on C-Span. Now that Hogan's Heros is in reruns, we could get our fix of Nazi humor on a daily basis...maybe even on our Smartphone. He would bring totally new meaning to the wonderful phrase, "I now NOTHING!"

And Linda McMahon would be the only politician in Washington who would not be lying when she says she's "wrestling" with a decision. Wow...finally...honesty in politics!You sexy bitch you...

So...vote comedy! We will all need a very good sense of humor once the election is over.

You can bet your Tea Party on that one!