Blog Jam

I'm suffering from Blogger's Jam. This is not to be confused with preserves or jelly...except for the fact that I love strawberry preserves and occasionally orange marmelade, which reminds me of my mother and my grandmother. Once, at my grandmother's apartment, which had been my mother's girlhood home in Manhattan, my mother fixed me a piece of toast with orange marmelade. I was about 5 but I still remember that. How could my mother know where the jelly and bread and plates and knives were in Grandma's kitchen? How could she know that? It never occurred to me that it had been my mother's kitchen too, as a young girl. She was no stranger there even though I was. I have never liked orange marmelade much but it is on the list because it reminds me of my childhood and my family and easier times. But strawberry is my fave and cherry too, especially the cherry from my friend's orchard in Provence. OMG!... or OMD (Oh Mon Dieu...which should never be taken for WMD...Words of Mindless Disillusion)...if you know what I mean.

But...I digress.

I have Blogger's Jam which is the equivalent of Writer's Block...which is not Writer's Bloc which is a cabal of writers...like the Algonquin Round Table.

No I have Blogger's Jam. I really can't think of anything interesting to write or opine about.

I'm coming up dry.

I'm tapped out.

Not dry like a good Martini. Not tapped out like a tired Maple tree.

No, friends, I'm exhausted. I have no fresh ideas. The political situation in this country, not to mention the time I've taken up agonizing about the goings on in my beloved France, has rendered me without thoughts.

I'm vacant and arid.

I'm adrift.

But I hope it will soon pass. I hope to be back at it soon. I hope to be delivering my witty, inciteful and always entertaining salvos of intellectual provocation to my devoted readership.

Meanwhile I'm going to relax with a piece of rye with strawberry jelly. Store bought rye, mind you. And jelly! Not fancy-schmancy preserves this time for me. And not free range rye made with exotic flour twice blessed by the local Rabbi.

Nope...rye from the convenience store and generic jelly! Argh Maytee!!

That's me.

That's what I'm doing.

Maybe the simplicity of the treat will inspire me to write again. Hopefully the tasty tidbits will jog me out of my creative nadir (what a great word, nadir...like Ralph Nadir...the depth to which the failed candidate sank after being too much of a good thing...you know...?)

Maybe it will be just the thing to get me back on track.

I sure hope so because this idleness is driving me crazy. It's making me eat foods that are bad for me. Jelly for god's sake. Think of all that sugar and red dye.

Oh well...all we can do is hope for the best. Tune in soon to see if I'm back or if I've disappeared into a rye toast and strawberry jelly-induced coma.

It could be worse. I could be searching for a way to end this blog and not be finding one...

HELP!!!



p.s...

I am copyrighting "Blogger's Jam" and "Blog Jam" but, if you are a follower of this blog, you may use those terms anytime, forever...for free. But track them. You heard 'em here first. Remember that...! Credit where credit's due and all of that...unless we find out that they were coined by someone at an earlier date in which case we might all be a part of the class action infringement suit...all of us...together...yay!!