Kids Say The Darnedest Things

My daughter is 16 now.  She used to be a child before she was an adult.

I know...16 is not an adult.  But by all measure, she is more of an adult than most of us masquerading as such.

We were in a conversation, while we were housebound during the blizzard, about guns and violence.
She offered her opinion and evaluation of the situation;

"It's bullying and home life that causes the problem of violence in our society."

What a novel idea.  Kids that are bullied become bullies and violence, in any form, at home begets violence in society.

Duh!

"You get more bees with honey."  That's an expression that I grew up with, a concept that always made sense.  And it has been proven to me time and again.  When I am nice to people (most people...) they are nice to me.  When people are nice to me I return the favor.

My parents were kind and loving and raised me in an environment of caring and affection.  I was listened to and my opinions mattered.

Albeit, I didn't always get what I wanted but, as Mick says, I got what I needed.  I had vibrant and interesting conversations with my folks about everything from politics to sports and beyond.  We often were at opposite ends of the intellectual spectrum...it was the sixties after all...but we always knew, at the end of the discussion (argument...) that we loved one another and all was well.

I have raised my daughter in the same way.  She doesn't always prevail and we occasionally differ but she knows that I love and respect her and would give my life for her.

She has a positive sense of herself and the confidence to go out into the world and take on all comers standing, all the while, in her truth and power.

She is kind...she went down the street yesterday to help the octagenarians shovel their driveway...loving, sensitive and caring.  Today she was upset at the fate of a wounded gull even though birds are not her favorite creatures.

When I was a little boy a cartoon depicted a group of vegetables playing in the garden.  There, off to the side, alone in the corner, sat the onion.  No one would play with the onion because the onion made them cry.

I, with my little feet extending just past the edge of the chair, turned to my mother and said, in all of my 4 year old wisdom, "Mommy, I would play with the onion."

My daughter would play with the onion too. 

Children who are brought up in environments of love and acceptance grow up to be tolerant and peaceful adults who are not prone to resolve their conflicts through violence, no matter what the instrument.

They don't, ordinarily, grow up to buy AK-47s, load them with 30 bullets, climb a bell tower and have target practice on a group of students simply because they got a D in biology.

Love our kids and they will love us back.

My teenager knows that.  The question then becomes...

Where are the adults...?