We're Screwed...and other Bedtime Stories.

Face it...we're screwed. Oh, and Happy New Year to my non-Jewish friends. Shana Tova was in September...remember..?

Anywhoooo...

We are so lost there is really no translation left. We have a Congress that is brain dead. They cannot hear the wails of the population. We have a financial sector that is so concerned with grabbing all of the money that they possibly can that they don't hear the people sharpening the broadswords and rolling out the Guillotines...even if Paris has cleaned up the Seine and made it, theoretically, safe for swimming...although I defy you to find a sane Parisian willing to take a dip...even during the deathly heat wave of '03...heads will bob like so many apples...or pommes if you're trying to be absolutely correct. I prefer blueberry pie, by the way...and not heated...and occasionally with vanilla ice cream...in case you were wondering, which you probably weren't...

As usual...I digress (I love saying "I digress"...it sounds so cultchudd and everything.)

The manufacturing folks are still making stuff we really don't need at a cost we really can't afford with precious resources that we are fast running out of. Who gives a mechanical hamster for Christmas anyway...(someone working for the TSA maybe...?)

The energy people are so busy not developing alternatives, or giving cred to the ones already developed, that it won't really matter when they do because we'll all be swimming by then. Yo, Al...got a spare floatie...?

And the TSA...oh my...GOD!! The Transportation Safety Administration. Have you flown anywhere lately? Have you seen the clowns that masquerade as professional line security forces, committed to our safety and security? I have never been in a Special Education class and I certainly mean no disrespect to those who have...but if "Welcome Back Kotter" was any indication (I love John Travolta though...he was awesome in Saturday Night Fever and he sure can dance...1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8) then we should, in the immortal words of Ace Ventura, Pet Detective, "hang on to (our) lug nuts folks...it's time for an OVERHAUL!"

We are screwed. A guy walks onto a plane with no luggage except a cigarette lighter (hmmmm...) and sits down, waiting for an opportune moment to...LIGHT HIMSELF ON FIRE!
("A guy walks onto a plane"...sounds like the beginning of a joke...too bad it isn't)

Oh...you're not kidding me...

Now, I concede, that without searching each and every passenger in a completely naked state (what about "mules" who swallow the drugs...can you put plastic explosives in a condom and swallow them...and then, because you are a circus flame swallower...ignite your stomach and fricassee yourself and your fellow passengers...?!) we can't be totally secure...but come on...can't we do better than this? Uh...I guess not...

Uh oh...

With the combination of selfish idiocy in Congress and, forgive me, in The White House (Obama seems not to be what he seemed to be...and I was in Denver...I saw with my own eyes...I felt the love...I cried..not really but that sounds better than "I almost cried"...my wife cried though...really...) and the deft placement of morons on the front lines...we are...what was it that I said...oh yeah...

...WE ARE SCREWED!

Did I say Happy New Year...?

Well then...Happy New Year...